Poker You’re Doing It Wrong
poker you're doing it wrong
a selection of some of my favourite one liners xxx funny or not xxx?
. Borrow money from a pessimist - they don't expect it back.
. If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?
. Mind like a steel trap - rusty and illegal in 37 states.
. Quantum mechanics: The dreams stuff is made of.
. The only substitute for good manners is fast reflexes.
. Support bacteria - they're the only culture some people have.
. When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane and going the wrong way.
. If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
. A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking.
. Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.
. For every action there is an equal and opposite criticism.
. Bills travel through the mail at twice the speed of checks
. Never do card tricks for the group you play poker with.
. No one is listening until you make a mistake.
Success always occurs in private and failure in full view.
good 1's again pmsl 10/10 x
New to Poker? - a Brief Introduction
If you want to start playing poker,you had better decide to play texas hold'em !.This game,though arguably not the best game of poker,has somehow superceded other forms of poker,particularly online.
Within texas holdem there are still decisions to be made.Do you want to play limit poker,no limit poker or poker tournaments?
This introduction only concerns LIMIT TEXAS HOLDEM.
Why ?.Well the tactics you use in no limit poker,and tournament poker will be completely different to those used in limit poker.Also limit poker,i feel,is the best test for a poker player.
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No limit poker can leave a player potless after hours of good play,just by going "all in" on what seems an unbeatable hand,only for a bad player,or loaded player who can go with you,to pull off a fluke.The player has done nothing wrong,they have to go with their hand,but,the bottom line is they are going home with nothing to show for all the good play that went before.
Tournament play is also largely down to luck(and patience).Also as with no limit poker,you can play great for hours only to lose out just before the share-out stage on one bad stroke of luck.Again the player does nothing wrong,but hours of play goes up in smoke with nothing to show for it.Limit poker is the game - you can play for as long as you feel good,and you can manipulate the stake you want to play for each and every hand.
THE PROCEDURE.Take your online seat.
Wait for large blind(2 players pay large and small blind every hand to start pot) - you will be prompted,just click to pay)
Two cards will be shown to you,and no one else.
A round of betting will now take place by other players round the table.If there has not been a "raise"(increase in your large blind stake you have already paid) then just "check"(it costs you nothing and you get to see next card for free).
If there has been a "raise"you can either go with them("call")and increase your stake or cut your losses and "fold" - We will show wether you should stay in or fold hands later.
Next the "flop" occurs - this is when 3 cards are dealt onto table,which everyone can see.
There is now another round of betting,and apply same procedure as in first round of betting.
Every player will now see another card dealt - the "turn" card.
There is now another round of betting,and apply same procedure as in first round of betting.
Every player will now see another card - the 5th and final card - the "river" card.
There is now another round of betting,and apply same procedure as in first round of betting.
The game is now finished - the player with the best hand wins the pot - less the poker house cut,the "rake"
Another game now begins,this time you will be prompted to pay the "small blind"-click to pay.After this game you will get a respite from paying to play,and will only pay again(unless you have good hand that you do want to play) when big blind rotates the table.
THESE ARE THE BEST HANDS IN RANK ORDER
1. Royal Flush
This is the highest poker hand. It consists of ace, king, queen, jack, ten, all in the same suit. As all suits are equal, all royal flushes are equal.
About the Author
By Pendil at British Betting and Gaming Sites......best 10 gaming sites..........easyplaygames
